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| So it's offical. I am leaving xanga. I am so sorry xanga! I loved you dearly while it lasted, you got me through some rough times in college, but it's to new things now. So, where am I blogging now? You can find me at blogspot.com
the address is www.lostinsidemythoughts.blogspot.com I think that's the website. I've only posted two entries so far or there and haven't gotten all the display how I'd like it yet, but it's coming.
Goodbye xanga 
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| So I've been thinking about switching sites for my blog. Something that's not....xanga. I'm just not sure where else to go. I guess blogspot.com is a pretty common site. I just feel like having a fresh start to my "online journal". I feel like maybe xanga was more in the past and my college days blog, but I should set up something new. I'll keep this site, I couldn't just erase it. There are so many memories that I would have never remembered without this site and so many entries I wrote where I really put my heart into it and got out what I was feeling. There is nothing better than that.
On a different note, I put together an office chair I got for my room all by myself  . I love it, it was definitely well worth the money. I just had a folding chair before, and ever since I moved back home I've wanted to get a better one, because I sit at my desk so much. Actually, I sat at my desk just as much, if not more at school so I should have gotten one then. Anyways, it is amazing and wonderful and I love it.
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| Gosh I'm lonely. You know when you watch a movie, or even TV show and you see a couple who are really pulling it off that they are truly a couple because you are completely lonely and longing to lay with someone and feel protected because of their on screen love for each other? Yeah.
You can be completely and utterly miserable and empty if there is no meaning to your [physical] closeness with someone. Even if you are together in the most intimate way. It almost makes me feel more alone then, than if I really was alone. Do I speak from personal experience? Maybe.
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| So I guess people look at this site. I've been looking at the feedback logs, and even though I can't tell who it is who is visiting (unless they have xanga and are signed in) but it shows facebook at as the referrer a lot, so I guess people have noticed that I've put my address up. Ah geez, anyways, doesn't really matter.
I have a hoodie on and I'm holding my guinea pig peanut, and I put her in the front pocket of the hoodie. It's so cute. I stuck her little head out. I can't really tell if she like it or not  .So yeah, it's hoodie season once again. It's always bittersweet seeing summer fade away. I hate mostly the shorter days. But, there's something nice about a cool crisp fall day. Winter's what I really hate.
I've been going dress shopping with Missy. She keeps acting like it's a bother for me or it's really boring, but honeslty I love it. It's so much fun. I get to play dress up and look at pretty wedding dresses and dream about my day. I tried on this dress tonight, and after awhile decided I really liked it. I only tried two on at Davids Bridal, and the other one is the one I think we're going with for Bridesmaids dresses. I said I liked the other one better because it was lighter, but the other dress poofed out and it seemed like it would be really hot, which is why we decided to go with the other one, since it's a summer wedding . I never realized what a girl I could be .
I feel bad too, because I know Missy is really indescive, and so am I. We're also both too nice. I don't want to be too opinionated, because I want Missy to chose what she wants, but between Missy being indecscive and wanting everyone to be happy, it's hard for me to stay unopinionated. We've just been going without everyone else for now, because she has six bridesmaids, we figured it would be good to get an idea before everyone comes out to try dresses on. I think that is a wise decision though, because that could become even more overwelming if everyone was there when she was just starting to decide. It's really hard though, I'm starting to learn. There are so many options nowadays. Anythings goes pretty much today too, so the options are endless.
I think if and when I get married, I'm just going to sit down with a clear head and try to picture what I want my wedding to be like. Then from there I'll pick a theme, color, and dresses scheme. Unless my taste changes, I already kind of have an idea. I know, don't think I'm crazy, I think more girls plan everything out before they even meet the guy than you think. And you know what, it doesn't help when you see like 50+ wedding albums up on facebook. Everybodies either in a wedding or going to weddings, so I constantley see different pictures which makes me brainstorm even more.
So...here's what I've got so far. I want a fall wedding. Somewhere between mid-September and end of October. I would like it to be outside, but I'm not set on that yet. If not outside, than in a church. I want brown, yellow, and orange flowers. For my dress I want a fitted long lace dress...either strapless or low cut with straps (not speghetti, V shaped) or with off the shoulder sleeves. I think I want my hair half up with curls coming down. Nothing special with shoes. I'll save money with just wearing some sort of semi formal sandals. I want long brown bridesmaides dresses. I would like to go simple with everything. I'd either have plain brown or maybe a ribbon at the waist that's a champain or light brown color. I'm not sure on the fabric or cut. What else. I'm not sure about the reception, I'll leave that up to my future fiance since the groom's parents are the ones who pay for that. Um yeah, that's about it. So, I've been thinking about it a lot, doesn't mean I want to get married anytime soon, cause I don't. No really, I don't. I'm not ready to be married. That means living with someone else for good and buying a house and in-laws. I'm definitley ready for a realationship that's actually going somewhere (like marriage haha). Blame it on all the freakin people around me getting married. It's all their fault. Yup
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| You told me
wait here patiently but
I wonder if he's kidding
Well maybe he could be serious now
Maybe not
Maybe not
Because'
Love is crazy
Pretty baby
Take it real slow
My feelings show
All you have to do
Is never ever let it go
My feelings show
And I want you to know
I'm sorry it's taking me so long
To find out what I'm feeling
I wonder if it will come to me
Maybe not
Maybe not
Because'
Love is crazy
Pretty baby
Take it real slow
My feelings show
All you have to do
Is never ever let it go
My feelings show
And I want you to know
My feelings show
I want you to know
What I'm trying to say is that
I'm feeling a change and
I'll let it take all over
If you need time away
I won't ask you to stay
But I don't want to lose you
Love is crazy
Pretty baby
Take it real slow
My feelings show
All you have to do
Is never ever let it go
My feelings show
Never ever let it go
My feelings show | | |
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